I'm actually getting excited about this project! (I know, ask me in a week how well I like it, once reality sets in.) I always have this wonderful anticipation about the new year beginning, and this year is no different. I new chapter of my life is truly beginning with 2009. My job that I've held for 10+ years has been ripped out from under me. I'm mad and sad about that all at the same time. I'm trying to listen to all the old adages - things happen for a reason, better days are coming, it might be the best thing that happened to you, etc, etc.
With this goal to gain control over my eating, I have something positive to focus on. I KNOW I can do it!!
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
A tiny bit of progress!
It's a small start, but I'm down two pounds, without really trying to do much. Even after eating extras like I described yesterday. Of course, that makes me wonder how accurate my scale really is. It's pretty old and sorry looking, but I'm trying not to be too focused on the number. I'll be able to tell a lot more by how I feel, or how my clothes fit, as I lose more. So, yippee!
Monday, December 29, 2008
Paying attention
I haven't actually changed anything yet, just trying to make myself more aware of why & when I eat. For example, yesterday afternoon I was headed to the hospital to visit a family member. It's roughly an hour drive, and I was tired, so tired in fact I caught myself drifting into the next lane on the highway! Fortunately, I didn't cross over the lane marking because there was a car in the next lane and I would have for sure sideswiped them if I didn't come out of my stupor in time. Scary! There was a McDonalds up ahead, so I got off the exit and went into McD's. For whatever reason, I came out with not just the 42oz diet coke to "wake me up", but also a hot fudge sundae. I wasn't hungry, but I think it was comfort food because I was a little shook up.
On the way home from the hospital, I was a little hungry. The family member has cancer (just diagnosed) and naturally I was upset. I was stopping at Walgreens for some sale items, and their Christmas stuff was 75% off. I came away with two chocolate eggs for 12c each. That's not huge, and I was proud that I controlled the purchase to just a snack for the way home and not an entire box of candy. But, could I have survived without it? Sure. I still had the diet coke left from the trip and I'm sure I would have arrived home without starving. Again, I think it was comfort food.
I came home and fixed a frozen pizza for hubby & me, one of those Red Baron frozen ones to which we add cheese. One piece, two pieces, three pieces, four pieces later I was done. Four pieces of pizza! Holy cow! Even hubby only ate two, but that's because he wasn't feeling good. Usually each of us eats four. Why? Who knows, just habit I guess.
This morning for breakfast I had my crystal light drink, cereal with banana & milk, and then a pbj sandwich. (Those are also my downfall). Now, I realize that's a pretty good sized breakfast, and I could certainly cut out the sandwich, or have just a half, or have it later for a snack. But, was that it?! No, within an hour, I opened the fridge to get a drink, and saw the leftover two slices of pizza. I sure wasn't hungry anymore, but I grabbed one and scarfed it down anyhow. See, no control whatsoever!
These are the behaviors I need to change, and I'm brainstorming ways to prevent this going forward. I've been working from home for the past several years, but will not have that job after the 1st. I think that might actually help me in the food department. First, we have to cut down our grocery bill. Second, it's just too easy to wander back & forth from the desk to the kitchen all day long. I'll be working some outside the house, and I will definitely NOT eat this much in front of other people. Plus, not being tied to a desk when I am home could be a plus. I have so many other projects to do that involve being up and moving around the house.
Wow, this sure is a long entry. I guess I have been paying a lot of attention.
On the way home from the hospital, I was a little hungry. The family member has cancer (just diagnosed) and naturally I was upset. I was stopping at Walgreens for some sale items, and their Christmas stuff was 75% off. I came away with two chocolate eggs for 12c each. That's not huge, and I was proud that I controlled the purchase to just a snack for the way home and not an entire box of candy. But, could I have survived without it? Sure. I still had the diet coke left from the trip and I'm sure I would have arrived home without starving. Again, I think it was comfort food.
I came home and fixed a frozen pizza for hubby & me, one of those Red Baron frozen ones to which we add cheese. One piece, two pieces, three pieces, four pieces later I was done. Four pieces of pizza! Holy cow! Even hubby only ate two, but that's because he wasn't feeling good. Usually each of us eats four. Why? Who knows, just habit I guess.
This morning for breakfast I had my crystal light drink, cereal with banana & milk, and then a pbj sandwich. (Those are also my downfall). Now, I realize that's a pretty good sized breakfast, and I could certainly cut out the sandwich, or have just a half, or have it later for a snack. But, was that it?! No, within an hour, I opened the fridge to get a drink, and saw the leftover two slices of pizza. I sure wasn't hungry anymore, but I grabbed one and scarfed it down anyhow. See, no control whatsoever!
These are the behaviors I need to change, and I'm brainstorming ways to prevent this going forward. I've been working from home for the past several years, but will not have that job after the 1st. I think that might actually help me in the food department. First, we have to cut down our grocery bill. Second, it's just too easy to wander back & forth from the desk to the kitchen all day long. I'll be working some outside the house, and I will definitely NOT eat this much in front of other people. Plus, not being tied to a desk when I am home could be a plus. I have so many other projects to do that involve being up and moving around the house.
Wow, this sure is a long entry. I guess I have been paying a lot of attention.
Sunday, December 28, 2008
Begin at the Beginning
I plan to officially start this journey to lose weight on January 1, 2009. I know, I know, it looks like yet another new year's resolution that millions of other people make. But I am determined to win! And, since losing is winning, I'm determined to lose too! See, I can't possibly fail.
For the next few days, I'll be working to mentally prepare for this as I do grocery shopping. I don't live within walking or even short driving distance of any stores, so if I don't have forbidden foods on hand, I can't mindlessly binge on them. Cookies and other sweets are my downfall. I also have a heavy diet coke habit to break. Then, there is this grazing thing of nibbling off and on all day long. And there is always the habit of having dessert after dinner, and sometimes lunch, and sometimes even breakfast. Who the heck has dessert after breakfast?! Why, me, of course.
So you see, there is a lot to gain control over.
For the next few days, I'll be working to mentally prepare for this as I do grocery shopping. I don't live within walking or even short driving distance of any stores, so if I don't have forbidden foods on hand, I can't mindlessly binge on them. Cookies and other sweets are my downfall. I also have a heavy diet coke habit to break. Then, there is this grazing thing of nibbling off and on all day long. And there is always the habit of having dessert after dinner, and sometimes lunch, and sometimes even breakfast. Who the heck has dessert after breakfast?! Why, me, of course.
So you see, there is a lot to gain control over.
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